Back home...

So that easy recovery I was praying for after surgery didn't quite happen! The surgery was last Thursday at St. Luke's in Milwaukee. Dr. Kamelle was able to remove all the infection from my left ovary, which was an 11.8 cm ball of infection. This resulted in losing 70% of my ovary. On the right ovary he removed another large cyst that resulting in losing 30% of that ovary. He was able to save my uterus and clean everything else up. So surgery was about 4 hours getting done at about 4:00 in the afternoon. I was in recovery until 10:00 pm because they could not get my pain under controll. So finally got a room in the hospital at 10:00 pm. We stayed until Sunday. Came home Sunday and was doing good eating etc. When I woke up Monday morning it was a different story. I could tell that something was wrong AGAIN! I started throwing up, wasn't able to eat anything and was miserable. Slept all day and woke up at about 4:00 am Tuesday throwing up continuously. Called Dr. Kamelle's office and they instructed to come back to the hospital. So we were at the hospital once again. When we arrived they tried to take blood and start an IV, but because I was extremely dehydrated this was so painful. Finally got a room and they gave me high doses of pain meds, antibiotics, chest X-ray and a blood transfusion and a upper GI scope to see if there was anything that could be making me nauseous. Scope looked good and we are still waiting on results from a biopsy to confirm my diagnosis of celiac. Was able to come home on Friday morning. So happy to be home!!! I have spent the last 20 of 40 nights in the hospital, which is just crazy to me!! I would love to say that I am dong great, but my stomach is still very sore from all of the incisions and I still just feel overall run down. I guess it will take a little while to get my strength back. Thank God through all of this my parents were able to come down and help out and Randy has done the best job of keeping the house running! I just can't wait to get things back to "normal"! I think my definition of this has changed after going through such a tough experience! Thanks again to everyone who is sending meals, flowers, cards, etc. and for praying for us! We can not even express our gratitude!! We are very lucky to have such wonderful friends, neighbors, and family!

Prep...

Yesterday I got a call from the Dr. that my pre-op EKG was abnormal and I would need to see a cardiologist before surgery. Great, one more thing to deal with. The cardiologist was able to get me in at 1:15, so off I went. He wasn't sure what was going on with my heart so he ordered a stress test. So for the next 2 hours they did an ultrasound of my heart while laying still and also walking on a treadmill to get my heart rate to 180, so they would have resting and exercising ultrasounds. Everything turned out fine! The cardiologist gave me the all clear for surgery! Thank God! So today I am doing the prep for surgery. This to me is the worst part! You can only have clear liquids for the entire day and then you also have to drink a mixture that will land you in the bathroom for the rest of the day. Fun times!! I am not a happy camper, but I am just keeping my focus on getting through this surgery and getting back to life! We are praying for a great surgery outcome and easy recovery! We appreciate the continued prayers and thoughts! Thank you!

Surgery...

We were finally able to get in to see a reproductive oncologist at St. Luke's hospital in Milwaukee. He reviewed my case and scheduled surgery for Thursday. I am doing everything in my power to make it until then. I am still in pain and so sick to my stomach that it takes everything just to go from the bed to the couch. So anyway, surgery on Thursday is going to be to remove the large cysts and clean everything up that is going on in my pelvis. He is hoping that he can do it laproscopically, but may have to open me up if the growths are too large. He has also said he will only take what's necessary so I am praying that I don't have to have a full hysterectomy at age 30! When we were explaining everything from the IVF to the trips to the ER I could not believe how crazy it all sounds. It has been such a circus and I can't believe it's been a month of dealing with this. It's no wonder Jaxston and Randy are getting so burnt out. I am really hoping for a quick recovery so I can just get back to taking care of my life and family! Thank you so much for all of the continued thoughts and prayers. We really really appreciate everyone's support!

Waiting...

So I was able to come home on Friday from the hospital and have been laying on the couch since. I am still on pain medication and high doses of antibiotics for 14 days. The previous fertility dr that we have used is taking a look at my case and consulting with a reproductive oncologist (who would be better at performing surgery on soft tissue) and we are waiting on a consultation to see where we go from here. I also made an appointment with another surgeon, but can't get in for another 3 weeks. So, here we sit and wait.
I really just want to get on with a surgery and get back to life. It is so hard to just lay around not knowing what is next and feeling like you are not getting any better. The pain and nausea are just not going away.
We are so grateful to have friends and neighbors dropping off meals! That has really helped! Thank you so much! We really appreciate everything everyone has done! Thanks again!!

Still...

In the hospital...
Last Tuesday my fever broke only for a few hours and after going to bed I woke up at 2:30 am Wednesday morning with even more excruciating pain than the previous Sunday. Randy called Dr. Pritts and she asked if I would be able to make it to Madison. I couldn't even make it out of the bed. Randy called an ambulance and they came and took me to St. Catherine's Hospital in Kenosha. Luckily, Jaxston slept through all of the commotion and didn't have to see his mommy taken away in so much pain.
Once at the ER we went through the whole story again, got my pain under control a little and did another CT scan. The endometriomas has grown to the size of 2 softballs and 1 tennis ball. They were leaking blood and fluid, which was causing some of the pain along with them being so big and pushing on my other organs and then also the pain from the infection.
Of course there are no reproductive endocrinologists in Kenosha, so they spent the better part of the day Wednesday deciding if I would need to be transferred to another hospital or just stay in Kenosha. Ultimately, it was decided that I stay in Kenosha because no one will do any type of surgery until the infection has cooled down.
So, here we are 7 days later still in the hospital trying to get better. Fevers have been down, white blood cell count down and hopefully in the next day or two I will be able to go home again.
We had to spend Easter in the hospital, but Jaxston has been well taken care of by my parents up north so we are so thankful for that! This is the hardest thing that we have had to go through and pray that it ends soon.
Plan once we are home is to meet with surgeon and see how quickly they would be able to do surgery. Surgery would entail cleaning everything out, but hopefully be able to keep my ovaries and uterus. At this point there will also be discussions around the benefits of actually removing everything electively so that the cysts and endometriosis don't come back.
Thank you for the continued prayers!

Fever...

So we thought we were doing good because my fevers haven't gone above 101.0...that is until today...fever was 103.2. Called Dr. Pritts and she advised she wanted me back in the hospital. I asked if there was anything else we could do. She said she would give me tonight...she is switching my antibiotic again and if my fever hasn't gone down by morning, it's back to Madison hospital.
PLEASE pray that my fever goes down, so I don't have to back! I really need some help in kicking this thing!
Thank you!

We are home...

Finally made it home from the hospital around 2:00 this afternoon. They didn't want to let me go because I have bacteria in my blood and they don't know where the infection is coming from, but I begged and said I wouldn't make it another night in that bed. After 5 days I had had enough!
So, I am still in pain and taking large amounts of antibiotics, but I get to do it from the comfort of my own home!
Dr. Pritts will be calling over the weekend to update us further...

Negative..

The pregnancy test turned out negative... :( :(

The good news is that I am hopefully leaving the hospital this afternoon.

Thank you to everyone who has been thinking about us and praying for us.

Hospital

Sorry I haven't updated! I am in the hospital in Madison and will hopefully be going home tomorrow.
We still have the hCG test tomorrow morning, so I will update as soon as I know the results.
I had endometriomas rupture and bleed into my pelvis on Sunday which resulted in a trip to the ER in Kenosha followed by a trip to Madison ER on Monday and have been in the hospital ever since.
I will try and write the whole story later when I am feeling more up to it!

Frozen!!

The nurse called yesterday and let us know they were able to freeze the last 2 embryos! This is great news because they didn't think they would be able to. She advised that 1 was good and 1 was less than good and of course we don't know if they would survive the thaw, but good news overall!!
8 days and counting...

Transfer Day...Wait and Pray...

The transfer is done!  Dr. Pritts came in and told us that we had only 1 "good" quality embryo and the 4 others were "fair" quality, so she advised that for the best chances of a pregnancy we should transfer 3 embryos!  She doesn't think that the remaining 2 embryos will make it until tomorrow to freeze to use for another cycle...so we are ALL in with 3 transferred! 

Here are our 3 potential babies!!!

 "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding..." Proverbs 3:5

Now we WAIT and PRAY...

Friday March 30, 2012 is the day that we can get the quantitative Beta hCG blood draw. 

10 days away...I am praying these days will go by fast. 

Thank you for all of your continued prayers! 

 

Don't pray for life to be easy, but pray for yourself to be strong.

-unknown

Making the Grade...

Embryo quality is graded on a 1 to 4 scale, with 1 being the best quality and 4 being poor.  Most pregnancies come from grade 1 and 2 embryos!  Here's how our embryos are shaping up...

                                                           Day 0:  14 eggs were retrieved

                                                           Day 1:  10 eggs fertilized to become embryos

                                                           Day 2:  9 embryos Grade 1  

                                                           Day 3:  6 embryos Grade 1

                                                           Day 4:  5 embryos Grade 1

                                                           Day 5:  ???? - Transfer Day

Transfer day is set for tomorrow (Tuesday) at 9:30 am! 

We are hoping for 2 great blastocysts to be transferred.

More to come after tomorrow's appointment!



FAITH...

According to God, we are to walk by FAITH, not by SIGHT...
We are putting all of our FAITH in God that we will have a good outcome from all of this!

Usually I am a worrier. I worry about everything...Jaxston, Randy, our dog Cabella, everyday tasks, being a good mom, and the list goes on and on. God did not intend for us to be worriers! Since deciding to go through with IVF I chose that I would not worry about every detail along the way, but instead put my FAITH in God and the Doctors so that i would not have to carry the burden of WORRY alone! So far through this last month I have felt a weight lifted by putting the worrying aside! Randy said to me today as we were driving home that I have changed from a Worrier to a Warrior! What an awesome compliment! Thank you Randy!
So as we embark on the last couple of weeks of this cycle...we are walking by FAITH!

As far as the egg retrieval, it was pretty straight forward. I think the most complicated part was the nurse not finding a vein for the IV after 3 tries. Finally another nurse was able to come in and get it done. Next, I was wheeled into the O.R. and given the "good stuff"! I don't remember anything after that until waking up to find Randy in the recovery room with me. I felt great laying there and had to stay for about an hour before I could go home. When I got up to get dressed the nausea set in, but I was able to make the ride home without any trouble. Now later in the night I still feel "hung over" from the anesthesia, but nothing too terrible!

14....

That is the number of eggs they were able to get! We are very happy with this! We have faith that a good number will make it to day 5 for transfer. Over the next few days they will call us to let us know how many fertilized and move on to the next stage. We are shooting for Tuesday to be the transfer day!
Stay tuned...

A Tisket, A Tasket...

I have eggs in my Basket! I made it! Injections are DONE! Yay!

Last night at 11:30 pm I did the last 2 shots. They had to be done specifically at this time because 35 hours later Dr. Pritts will do the egg retrieval. Thursday is the day to remove the eggs! I will be put under anesthesia, which is always a little nerve wracking, but I guess better then feeling pain. :( They will then use ICSI (intracytoplasmic sperm injection) to fertilize the eggs in a petri dish and we'll be praying that there are good quality embryos that make it to day 5. On day 5 they will transfer them back in and then we wait to see if it turns into a pregnancy!

I am ready!
Let's make a baby...ummmm, a petri dish baby!!

THANKFUL...

Things are moving along! The visit today went well. Follicles are maturing! Only 1 more night of Follistim injections and then Ganirelix and Ovidrel tomorrow and I am done with the shots! Yay!!! Retrieval day is set for Thursday!

So THANKFUL I didn't have a very hard time with the medication. I was expecting things to be really bad, but I have actually felt better on all of these hormones!?! I asked Dr. Pritts if anyone has ever said that before and she responded "no" (with a tone that implied I might be a bit off my rocker), but whatever! Throughout this process I am taking what I can get and if that means crazy amounts of hormones to make me feel good, then I guess I am a little off my rocker!  :)

Dr. Pritts wants to see me again tomorrow, so that means another 4 hours of driving for a 15 minute appointment! Luckily, I don't mind driving. It gives me a sense of peace having the radio blaring and singing songs at the top of lungs. I am sure people are laughing as I pass them dancing away in my SUV!

Seriously though, it gives me time to think. Today during my drive I was thinking about what to write as a blog post besides just an updated status and decided that I am so surprised from all of the comments that people have shared with me. I wanted to say THANK YOU to everyone who is praying for us and thinking of us during this time in our lives! I guess I didn't really think that much about posting things so personal in my life because I just felt it was the right thing to do to keep people updated...I have received e-mails from people sharing their infertility stories and also comments that I inspire them and that I am a strong person for going through all of this. Me??? Inspiring??? Strong???  WOW! I never expected to hear so many wonderful comments!

THANK YOU!

Rock Star

After another 4 hours of driving today things are looking good!  According to Dr. Pritts everything is right on track and she is happy with how I am growing follicles!  Her exact words were that with a little help from liquid gold, a.k.a Follistim, I am able to produce follicles like a "Rock Star"!  Did she really just say "Rock Star"???  Yes, she did!  I couldn't help but have a flashback to my college days at a dive bar called Newby's in Memphis.  I happened to be fond of a little drink called a "Rock Star" that consisted of a Long Island Iced Tea minus the cola mixed with Red Bull.  I think it only took one night of drinking this for me to realize I'm not much of a drinker!  Ha!  But, thank you Dr. for making me feel young again.  Not that 30 is old, but I don't typically use the term "Rock Star"!

Anyway, my estrogen levels are continually increasing and the lead follicles have reached greater than 14mm, which means we add another medication to inject in the morning to keep me from ovulating on my own.  Next appointment is on Monday and then the egg retrieval will be Wednesday or Thursday of next week!  Counting down the days!

Yep, I lied about the injections...they HURT!

Not sure what has happened with the injections, but they totally hurt now! The first couple of days weren't so bad, but now it starts to hurt as soon as the needle goes in. Also, I'm getting some lovely bruising going on because these are in my stomach...thankfully there won't be any bikini wearing in Wisconsin in March! Only one more week to go!
Next ultrasound and blood draw are on Thursday!
I am not sure where I first saw this video, but just wanted to share!

Ready, Set, Go...

We are starting IVF! 
Meds
I received some of my meds on Wednesday of last week.  We only ordered enough to get through the first few days in case Dr. Pritts needs to switch them.  This was $3,000.00 worth!  I can't believe the crazy amounts of money this is costing!!

Baseline Visit
I had an appointment on Friday for what is called the baseline visit.  This consists of a baseline ultrasound examination, baseline serum estrogen determination, a mock embryo transfer, signing consent forms, and let's not forget...the PAYMENT!  My parents were in town visiting so my mom was able to make the drive to Middleton with me.  It was nice to have company on the 2 hour each way trip!

My appointment went good!  Dr. Pritts said everything was just the way it should be and I was ready to start the nightly injections of 450 units of Follistim. 
Payment Time
Then is was time to pay.  I was nervous and sweating about to pay $18,000.00.  I mean, once we do get pregnant and have another child there won't be any money left to feed it, but I guess we'll worry about that when the time comes!  :) 
I met the financial coordinator to take care of the payment and she asked if Dr. Pritts had approved the option of 2 fresh cycles and anything frozen.  Ummm, yes we were told in the consultation that we had qualified for it.  The financial coordinator said she needed to check with Dr. Pritts.  I knew this couldn't be good.  Dr. Pritts came in after a few minutes and said she was sorry, but now we didn't qualify for that option because of my ultrasound results and not having enough follicles.  What!?!  Dr. Pritts said we could do the option of one fresh cycle and one frozen for $12,000.00.  Of course I was breaking down by this point.  I said, but you told us we would qualify????  Feeling much like my 4 year old stomping his feet saying, but you said we could do it!!!  Then the tears came...we had planned on this option and were excited for the second chance if the first cycle didn't work.  I was shocked!  I couldn't believe that once again things were not going the way I had planned.  This is obviously the theme here.  Nothing in fertility treatments go the way you plan for them to go.  I called Randy and of course he talked me through my little melt down and said of course this was fine to go ahead with this option.  The good thing is that maybe it will only take one time and we will have saved money in the long run.  Let's hope!  Even though things didn't go as planned on this visit, I really feel like Dr. Pritts was sorry.  She said we are going to do everything we can to make a baby and apologized more than once.  That is more than I can say for the other Dr. at Aurora.  I feel like we definitely made the right choice in choosing Dr. Pritts!!  I feel confident that she is on my side throughout this, as much as one can be when they are getting paid so much money.  Obviously, people become Dr.'s for the money and I guess to help people a little bit, right?!?
Injection Time 
Friday night was the first injection...not too bad!  I was SO afraid to have to do these shots on myself, but it has been o.k.  It only burns when the medication goes in and then for a while after that, but nothing terrible.  So, 3 nights of injections down and about 11 to go!
1st Follicle Count
Today I went to Middleton again for a repeat ultrasound and serum estrogen determination.  I have 11 follicles growing!  Dr. Pritts says this is great for me not having a lot of follicles to begin with!  Yeah!!!  A step in the right direction!!!  FINALLY!!!
(On a side note, I found a ton of websites that have to do with laughing at infertility.  I may post a joke now and then because for Randy and I, if we don't laugh and be sarcastic at this crazy situation we find ourselves in, I don't think we'll make it!  Infertility itself is not very funny.  It affects many people and I don't make light of the situation that anyone is in, but for me it is easier to laugh to keep my sanity.  I hope that you understand!  And this might just be the meds talking today.  Who knows what kind of crazy mood swings are about to ensue!)
  

Catch Up...

I assume where to start is always the question when someone decides to do a blog!  I feel like it's a good idea to give a little history about how we have gotten to where we are now.  So here goes!
We have a 4 year old son that took about 16 months to conceive.  After 1 year of unsuccessfully trying, we went to the Dr.  We lived in West Michigan at the time and my Dr. was very conservative.  She said to chart my Basal Body Temperature and after that we could talk about other options.  Well, I guess that was the trick.  Our son was born in July 2007!

Fast forward 2 years and we have moved to WI.  Starting to think about adding to our little family of 3!

Start trying again with no luck.  Wait another year because that is the standard before doctors will talk with you about infertility.  Wish we would have gone in sooner, but kept thinking it would just happen. It did not happen. 

• January 2011 met with Reproductive Endocrinologist at Aurora Fertility in Milwaukee.  They assured us that everything looked good and because we had already had one child things should move along quickly.  Again, they did not!
• February 2011 did blood work...everything comes back fine.
• March 2011 HSG test to make sure my tubes are not blocked and semen analysis for Randy...everything comes back fine.  Conclusion is to try IUI (intra-uterine insemination) because everything looks "fine".  Go in for an ultrasound to see follicles, etc. for IUI monitoring.  Find cysts on my ovaries.  Need to wait until next month to see if cysts go away.
• April 2011 cysts are still present.  Dr. prescribes a month of birth control pills to see if they go away.
• May 2011 cysts are still there and growing.  Dr. recommends surgery to remove cysts. 
• June 2011 undergo laproscopy to remove cysts and some spots of endometriosis.  Again, they say everything goes "fine".  Need to wait 2 months before trying the IUI.
• August 2011 do first round of clomid and hCG injection for IUI.  IUI is not successful.
• September 2011 do second round of clomid and hCG injection for IUI.  IUI is not successful.
• October 2011 get second opinion from a Dr. in Gurnee to see if the path we are doing is the correct one.  He suggests that our chances of conceiving through IUI are about 14% because of the endometriosis and I have a low antral follicle count because of the surgery to remove the cysts also removed a large number of eggs from my ovaries.
• November 2011 take the month off to come up with a plan of action.  Decide that we will do one more IUI and then move on to IVF. 
• December 2011 do third round of clomid and hCG injection for IUI.  IUI is not successful.
• January 2012 move forward with plan to do IVF.  Aurora Fertility offers a shared risk program that costs $22,000 (excluding medication) for three rounds of IVF.  If not successful you are refunded 70%.  Ask the Dr. if we would qualify for the program and says yes that everything looks good to proceed.  Do more blood work for IVF and start birth control pill.  Get a call from the Dr. that my bloodwork has come back and my AMH level is 1.05 and must be 1.25 in order to qualify for the shared risk.  We can proceed with IVF schedule, but the cost for one round is $14,800 (excluding medication) and if it doesn't work you are not refunded anything!  Decide that is too great of a risk to take and start looking for another ferility clinic.
• Had gotten a recommendation for a clinic in Middleton, WI (2 hour drive from Kenosha).  Decide that after watching videos on their website we should give it a shot.  
• February 2012 have initial consultation with Dr. in Middleton.  She advises that there was almost no chance that we would have gotten pregnant with the lowest doses of clomid and IUI.  She also states that because of the surgery and the Dr. in Milwaukee burning the inside of my ovaries that I lost a great deal of eggs and that I am at the end of my reproductive years!  WOW!  We did not see that coming!  Get over the shock of this and decide to pursue IVF with the Dr. in Middleton.  She advises that the chances are good at 40-50%.  We'll take it!
• Do one last test...HSG to make sure my uterus looks good.  Everything goes great and we are off to plan the schedule for IVF.
• Last week, I drove to Middleton for one more consultation on IVF and chose the plan that gives us the option of up to 2 fresh cycles and anything frozen for $18,000. 

So after over 2 years, countless Dr. visits, and thousands of dollars, this is such a huge commitment of finances, emotions, and time.  Let's keep our fingers crossed that it is all worth it!!!!  We are very hopeful!